Productivity at Dawn

When do you feel most productive?

I definitely feel more at peace and at ease and, therefore, more productive at Dawn.

It is quiet,there are few distractions and there is plenty of time at the start of the day.

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Winky

What are your favorite emojis?

Hola

A friendly emoji wink,just to say hello and hope all is well with you.

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Limited Conversation

What topics do you like to discuss?

It really didn’t matter what topic she wanted to discuss.No one ever listened to Gabby.

That was reality,every hour of every day was filled with people talking at her.Wanting her to understand what they were saying and how they felt about things.

To some, it was just a game,a game of dominance,a chance to prove how clever they were.To others(more bearable Gabby thought) were those who saw her as the opportunity to talk to someone about whatever was bugging them as normally no one would listen to them. Gabby was their window on their world.

Gabby knew it was a skill to listen but  felt she had perhaps  missed the boat and had forgotten how to talk.

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A Risk Assessment?

When was the last time you took a risk? How did it work out?

Is doing a risk assessment dangerous work? Of course,because there is a danger in over and under reacting. Never being right.

I assess my risk every day and conclude that I must do something and that there is risk in everything.

Risky Manouvere

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I do not regret playing the stock market (gambling) even though I lost a bit of money.

Gambling

I don’t bet as a rule, and neither do my brothers and sisters as far as I know.Having one parent who let gambling get a little out of control;should we say;it’s not an attractive prospect.

Nevertheless, I signed up to an app(now defunct) that let me play the stock market.I think I invested about £600 and over a period of about five years lost it all.I’m still nor sure it was a scam.

Truthfully, though, it had its ups and downs ,and I enjoyed using it.If I had some spare cash,I’d try it again.But I don’t and so  I haven’t and now it’s a happy memory.

I enjoyed the cut and thrust of the market in my own small way. I suppose I was careful and didn’t risk anything I couldn’t afford.

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Any Place Full of Pain and Cruelty.

To say never is to deny its existence if only to yourself.These places need to be visited in order for them to change.

I admit it ,I live in a pretty cosseted world where I see little real pain and little real cruelty.

There are ,however,many places where abhorrent human behaviour happens.I don’t visit them,but some people do to bear witness and act for change.

I would never say never to visit a place if I could do some good.

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Uncle Graham

The guardian angel everyone thought was a black sheep

I was told as a young girl to stay away from Uncle Graham. He would appear intermittently in our lives.He was a traveller ,an adventurer, and he did not fit in.

My mother,God, rest her soul,was afraid of Uncle Graham.She saw him as a bad influence on her curious, quirky daughter who was close to reaching her teens.

Of course,the fact that everyone disapproved of him made me visit his little condo more when I knew he was around. Unknown to my mother, we texted each other regularly,  and I was probably one of the few people at any given time who knew where he was.It was his safety net.

I was very good at hiding things from my family.They seemed to disapprove of everything I liked or did.

One day, though,I got into a situation way beyond my control.A so-called friend had called at my house, and we had we’d  gone to the local park. There ,we met a group of boys and young men.I knew immediately who they were, and they dealt in drugs.

Stupidly,I didn’t want to look like a sissy,so we laughed and joked with the young men.I suppose hormones kicked in, and I was flattered.One young lad seemed to take a particular interest in me and passed some white tablets into my hand.

“Here, take these,it’ll be amazing! We can go to my flat later”.

Just at that moment,Uncle Graham appeared,looking very dishevelled. All the young lads thought he was drunk and started laughing at him.

I felt the pills in my hand,I knew I did not want to take them.Uncle Graham wondered up to the boys and said to the boys

“You selling good stuff ?”

“What’s it to you, Old Man?”

“Just asking? What’ve you got?”

“Go away,Old Man,you couldn’t  afford what we’ve got?”said the one who had passed me the tablets.

“How much?Your whole stash,including the pills you just passed to that young girl!”

“That’s none of your business,old man!”Said the tall young lad who  was increasingly  agitated.

“Suppose it’s not,but I said how much?It’s a fair question,you’re a businessman, aren’t you?”

“Look it’s ,not for sale…:

“Oh, so you ain’t no businessman then?What are you a pimp?”

At that time, all the other boys started laughing, and I began to get embarrassed.

“Will you sell me the pills,little girl?.”

I saw this as my way out.

“Of course, I wasn’t going to take the stupid things anyway. Twenty dollars”

Uncle Graham reached into his pocket and took out a very dirty twenty dollar bill, and handed it to me.I took it and said to the others.

“See you guys,I’m off to the mall,buy myself a new top,they’ve got a sale on.”

The group of boys and now one girl looked incredulous.

Uncle Graham pottered off in the opposite direction while I made my way around to the gate at the other side of the park,heading towards the mall.

We circled the park ,and when we met up at the gate,Uncle Graham and I smiled at each other.

“Thanks, Uncle Graham,that was very scary.”

“No need to be scared of people like that,they ain’t no good at business are they?Now you owe me a coffee  let’s go to Dino’s Café,your paying!”

I laughed .”No problem, Uncle Graham!”

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The Zero

A Fictitious Non-Eatery

©️GeraldineBanks2024

It was a calorie-less idea. Norm, a young thirty something millionaire chef, had started The Zero as a joke.

It had all begun as the takings from his triple Michelin Star Restaurant in Edgbaston,a suburb of Birmingham, had taken a dive. The old restaurant could no longer support him and his growing family.He had two great children and a pregnant wife. He did not want to let them down ,he knew he had to move fast to avoid getting into debt.

As the building lease was about to be renewed,he terminated it and told his wife that they were moving to London.It was short notice, but Monica was used  to Norm’s ways.She knew whatever he was doing,it would be for the best.

He managed to rent a house for them from a fellow chef who was moving to Australia. Norm worked evenings , cooking for celebrities,it was good money and almost seven days a week.

The personal chef dinners he made for his celebrity clients were inspirational.None of them wanted to eat anything with fat,oil, or starch in it. He would present a meal,but most of it wasn’t eaten.His speciality ,no calorie spritzer, was a great hit with the diners.It was a special recipe that Norm had devised and he wouldn’t divulge to anyone. Yes ,it was no calorie,but it had a rare mushroom in it,known to lift the spirits without I’ll effect.

After a few months of working every evening and looking for premises for his new “Zero” restaurant.Norm found the perfect location.It was a trendy bistro in Soho that, like Norm’s old place  was finding it impossible to make ends meet.

After a fair negotiation,where Norm agreed to take on the remaining five year lease. Norm refurbished the restaurant and with his mate Connor from Birmingham as Maitre D,he set up in business.

Norm knew every no calorie recipe in the book and knew how to combine herbs and gels to make the most amazing dishes.His mushroom spritzer was a real hit and was analysed by the Enviromental Health people from the council and given full approval.People would come in to solely  drink a glass of his spritzer.

There was not a calorie in sight,and Norm expanded his network of “Zeros”. As an aside,he would also buy normal restaurant supplies and do meals for low income and homeless people. After all, it was all tax deductible, and he didn’t want to lose his ability to cook. Still, the money was in the no calorie stuff.

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Babes

©️geraldinebanks2024

A tiny fist pump through the soil was how it began.

They had buried so many dead babies that they realised  they no longer had the time for ceremony or any kind of enclosure had hit them hard as the babies could escape.

Life was precious,so we had babies,lots of them,but we didn’t have enough food to feed them,so most died.The mothers and fathers were healthy enough,you got coupons for being pregnant,you could have the best of everything or so it felt.

Now that the babies had started resurrecting ,the people were not so sure.

Resurrection had not been part of  the plan.The aim  was to keep the population happy with sex and drugs and the freedom to do what they wanted.It had worked for centuries.

The government, with the problem, emerging literally in front of their eyes, had tried to bulldoze the situation. It had brought diggers in to destroy existing burial grounds and what was left of the corpses.

They had no idea what was causing it,but in fact, by churning up the soil, they had enabled somehow the process of reviving the ” Life ” in those tiny bodies. So the problem became out of control.

Some argued that this was very positive and that any life was good.Others that the fear and dread that the armies of babes were causing was causing concern and that the fact that they could not be killed  meant that like rats they would be an ever present problem.

No one liked to see them when they appeared.They stole,they chased people down the street, and they took over towns and villages as no one could bear  living  near them.

The Babes  could not move very fast,but there was such a lot of them when they marched together ,they were intimidating and  also you could not destroy them.

Initially, after protests and complaints from the public .The government had used  military operations to kill them.

However,it took the authorities  a while to realise that death was not the answer as all the carnage imposed on the Babes could not kill them but had only injured  them  and made them appear as monsters.Some were so badly disfigured that it was painful to look at them.The Babes of course felt no pain.

Slowly,the Babes were taking over the country, and eventually, it would be the world.

Government policy was changed, and people were no longer encouraged to have big families .

The effort was put into ensuring that new babies were nutured and survived into adulthood to reduce the number of Babes.At the same time, the scientists began researching  the elements that brought about the resurrection of the babes. However,the results were kept secret as everyone knew that an elixir of life would bring a whole new set of problems.

The Babes that  live to this day are ever present and will be with us forever.

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The River Chimera

I first met Oscar Wilde about a year before he was released from Reading Gaol. He was thin and had pustules on the skin of his face and bad breath.We had many conversations over that  year and I watched on the day of his release as he was hurried away in a coach and horses organised by his supporters and  friends that did not desert him and hoped to help him recover

Even in those evil  days,there were good people who believed in prison reform.I was a member of such a group, and that is how I  met Oscar.

Due to his kind and personable nature and I believe the intervention of an assistant governor who was  empathetic to Oscar’s predicamemt. I believe he had the same proclivities as dear Oscar,although hid it ver well.Oscar,  had been given certain privileges having suffered  the indignities of a horrendous  first few months of picking twine and the thing that was notoriously called the hamster wheel.Initially it was felt an example should be seen to be made.

Within a few months,however,he was given pen and paper,and a chance to have visitors.This unfortunately did not extend to providing health care,which in truth Oscar needed.However,I was allowed to bring some relief by supplying him with “drops” which I believe eased his aches and pains ,though it was obvious by then,Oscar’s health was deteriorating but the “drops” eased his pain.

One thing Oscar did was talk,and we talked and talked about every subject under the sun. I didn’t so much fall in love with the man ,but with his intellect.He was in love with everyone and everything he saw through falsehood and had passions for beauty that I could only imagine.He loved and his passion for loving rubbed off on me.

Oh my, as an aside, that sounds quite rude and made me blush,but we did not have that sort of relationship,and sitting now in my comfortable armchair, I can only regret we did not. Oscar loved in all ways.

But I must calm myself.I am  not progressing my story of The River Chimera.For  Oscar was indeed a mystical man,his story of Dorian Gray had a profound effect on me, and I told him so,many times,and he argued that it was a story a fiction. His strength of feeling was such ,I knew there was more to the story than he would admit.

The last time I saw Oscar was in a bar at Calais,his pustules were covered in heavy theatrical make-up, and his eyes  were outlined in red and looked deep set within their sockets.He did not look long for this World.

Oscar wanted money from me, and I was more than happy to give it to him.I had known the man, and he was a good man.If I could help, I would.

The Oscar I had known was not the man sitting in front of me blustering and guffawing .There was  no longer any connection between us ,his brain purely sought material means,there was no joy or happiness.It was mechanical.I was a means to an end.In truth, his brain had gone,destroyed by syphilis.

Dorian Gray ,though, stuck in my mind. It was a picture on my living room wall that made me think again of the story. At first, it seemed harmless, it was a view of a river.

However,when I sat in my chair and looked in the mirror;the picture was reflected back at me.It was then I noticed the subtle changes in the picture,as the winter night continued.

The River

The river in reflection, showed  various images of chimaera,both animal and human.Horrible creatures that stared at me and beckoned me into their worlds.I could not help but stare back  at them. Some looked like dragons,some like staring eyes of men or gigantic slugs with wings.

The River Chimera

Yet I would look back at the picture, and it contained only the attractive  scenic view of the river.What the mirror reflected, I will never know or be able to question why these apparitions appeared.I would if Oscar had still been alive and at the height of his powers have asked him.

The images disturb me ,yet I keep the mirror and will not move the painting.Oscar faced his fears, and I also will do so…..

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