Monthly Archives: March 2024

El Hotel de Profund

©️GeraldineBanks2024

What had happened to her parents and all their money? Susan was devastated,there had been a tacit agreement that her mum and dad would spend their retirement income  doing what they loved, extreme sports, but that their house and various investments would be Susan’s inheritance.

She loved her parents and thought that they loved her.Now they’d left her with a missing person’s enquiry and an  increasing glut of debts and legal wranglings that  she had no resources to  deal with.The house had gone remortgaged to the hilt,repossessed and all she had was a letter from her parents Roger and Carrie saying that they had passed their professional “Saturation Diver ” course and were booked into El Hotel de Profund for six months and not to worry.

Roger and Carrie were both  early retirement adrenalin junkies. Together, they reached their  mid-fifties and were able to retire comfortably with their government index-linked pensions and follow their passion for participating in extreme sports.

They travelled the World Bungee Jumping,Downhill Mountain Biking,Heli-Skiing,Snow-Boarding, Flow boarding,White Water Rafting and Kayaking.The potential for travel and adventure was endless and Roger and Carrie made the most of their opportunities.

They researched and practised until they had mastered their chosen field and  were confident of achieving the ultimate “high” for whatever activity they were doing without endangering themselves or each other.

It was  on their  trip to Mexico, Deep Diving in Fresh Water Caves,that they heard out  about “El Hotel de Profund.”

Over the  dinner held  for those participants  who had successfully passed their Deep Diving Course ,the  “Hotel” had been hotly discussed.Some had thought it a mythical place invented by specialist divers in a frenzy of one up man ship. No one had actually been there,but the story went that the hotel had been built on foundations leading  down to an extremely deep cleft underground.To all intent and purposes, it was , in  effect, bottomless. The real depth was unknown, and the only way of diving it was to enter through the gateway of the Hotel,by invitation only.

The Hotel had been bought in the Nineteen Sixties by a loose conglomerate  of hippy divers who had made their money in the oil industry.

The Hotel was in continous need of investment for the development of the “big hole” as the excavations were called.So the group of owner divers changed regularly to keep the money flowing and also to replace divers “lost” while  surveying the latest dig into uncharted territory.

There had been no shortage of fresh investors,everyone wanted a piece of the action.Everyone, that was ,who was an expert diver. It was an exclusive club,it had to be,the exploratory dives were made to unimaginable depths.It took great skill to survive.The divers were entering uncharted water. Only shareholders were allowed to take that risk.

The word was that El Hotel de Profund was developing into  the best deep diving location in the  world. There were  fatalities during the exploration and excavation .These people were used to the odds being stacked against them. To be asked to invest was an honour because it also meant that you got to dive the hole. In the early days,it was only the shareholders who could dive. It was a very exclusive; and, a dangerous  club to be a member of.

Now ,in the year two thousand and twelve and having been in business for over sixty years ,the Hotel’s excavations had ceased. El  profund welcomed guests with deep diving qualifications and had an excellent record for safety. Still, very few people knew where el Profund was or indeed how to get to it.There was no such thing as “booking a room” online. The guest list was  still by invitation only, and there were a select few of regular visitors. All the staff in the hotel were knowledgeable and qualified divers.

Roger and Carrie listened intently to the talk of the hotel at the dinner.They had loved their deep diving experience and had proved themselves as “divers” passing,”Bell Diver Lead”,with ease and making inroads into the next step of “Saturation Diving” where gases and decompression were a science that had to be mastered to ensure safety when diving at extreme depths. A science but also an art,Roger and Carrie excelled,they were taking courses and doing work experience where allowed,despite the fact they were now in their early Sixties.

They were known now in the industry ,as exceptional divers, word had got around that Roger and Carrie could dive anywhere,they were to be trusted,they had earned their deep diving saturation spurs and in truth,if they had been thirty years younger and insurable,they would have had very successful diving careers.

They were ,however ,forced to finance themselves, and diving became their joint obsession. They would join projects and be part of a team of divers,but all at their own expense. In the back of their minds , there was always the chance that through working on  these projects that they would finally  get the invitation to El Hotel de Profund  they desired.

The invitation came on Roger’s birthday,it was a letter direct from el Hotel.Roger and Carrie were invited and the costs of their stay were outlined on the invitation.They were asked to sign a non-disclosure agreement  and the letter stated that the travel arrangements would be  made and  covered  by the hotel once Roger and Carrie had confirmed  they were available and  completed the necessary paperwork.

“Well ,at least we don’t have to fork out for that! The other expenses, my…it’s a lot, Roger. ” Carrie said.

Roger smiled at Carrie . “Carrie, we’ve come this far,we’ve got to do it.What are you going to tell Susan”

“What we always say,we’re off on an adventure.”

They both laughed and smiled together.

Carrie wrote in the note she sent Susan  the name of the hotel and that it was a unique extreme diving experience and they would be away for up to six months.Carrie posted   the note  before she signed the non-disclosure document,so she didn’t feel she had broken any agreement with El Hotel and she felt Susan would have enough information in case she needed to contact them in an emergency.

Unfortunately ,as events unfolded,despite searching for details of el Hotel de Profund everywhere , Susan  found nothing.So the note from her mother only added more layers to the mystery of her parents disappearance.The local police had involved Interpol and it turned out that Hotel Profund was quite a common name and there was no registration documents anywhere for the missing couple.They  had vanished into thin air.

The chauffeur driven car had  collected Roger and Carrie and their luggage on a cold Autum morning  a couple of months after they had received their invite.They did not need diving equipment it would all be supplied and they could relax on their journey as all the travel arrangements were in place.

Roger and Carrie arrived fresh from their journey at El Hotel de Profund after their chauffeur driven,private jet, and first class table service trip with the best food and drink they had ever tasted .Their arrival was no less classy,the entrance to the hotel was grand,they arrived in darkness,their watches said it was 9.00pm so they couldn’t fully appreciate it’s beauty.

The front of house staff were attentive but not intrusive.Roger and Carrie were tired after their journey, and arrangements were made for a morning call.

The next morning in the warm sunshine, they were  breakfasting in the gardens when a stranger asked if he could join them at their table. The gentleman’s name was Raymond Crete,he was a co-owner of the hotel and as they talked,they discovered that Raymond was an extremely well qualified diver and had been to every dive site that Roger and Carrie had visited.

During their conversation over breakfast,it became apparent that their invite had come by way of  many recommendations, and Roger and Carrie basked in their mutual feeling of  success.

Raymond delicately ate some yoghurt with honey and almonds that he ordered and bluntly asked

“Had they brought the money?”

“Indeed ,two million dollars ,small bills as requested,it’s upstairs in the room safe.”

“That’s wonderful,I will arrange for it to be collected,so you will no longer have to worry about it.There will be no further expenses.Now it is up to you to decide what floor in the hotel you wish to reach?”

Roger and Carrie looked at Raymond with puzzled faces.

“Our little joke,the hotel has 14 floors, the ground floor or 13  where the lobby is , your room  is  on the 14th floor. Floor 12 is your first dive….and so on.You can sleep on the floor you dive,depending on your saturation levels.

Really ,after Floor 8 ,it is best to spend time adjusting to the pressure,we have  decompression chambers on each floor starting on floor 8. That is why we suggest a 6 month stay, there is so much to see and experience.”

“Sounds amazing. Are there trainers or guides or anything?” Carrie asked.

“Oh yes, on  all floors,it is very necessary,the floors are all labyrinths,you would get lost without help. Also,  on the lower floors,we have two restaurants, for the deep divers,they are quite an experience.In essence you can stay down as long as you like.”

Raymond continued.”Your first safety talk will be tomorrow , and you will meet Javier, who will be coordinating your stay. You can ask Javier anything, and he will be happy to accompany you on any of the dives.”

“That’s wonderful!”Carrie said.

“In the meantime, enjoy the gardens and the  warmth of the sun. Everything is so different under the water.” Raymond smiled and excused himself.

Carrie was beside herself with excitement.

“Good, Grief Roger,this is amazing. Everything is below us,it’s below our feet, and we are going to explore it.”

“Yes,let’s just enjoy today, we can meet Javier tomorrow and find out what’s next.I must say so far, I’m not disappointed.”

  The next day Javier was already waiting for them  in the hotel briefing room, which  doubled as a small cinema for guests when  Roger and Carrie entered at the agreed timeThey were  used to these initial project meetings ,discussing depths,their state of health, depression gases.Javier was  obviously an expert in his field. Javier took measurements for wet suits,dry suits and diving helmets,he checked their preference for tanks and explained some of the equipment had been especially designed for the conditions in the “big hole” and they would not have seen  it’s like before.

The personalised suits and equipment would not be ready for about two weeks,in the meantime, they could enjoy their leisure time,a car would always be available should they wish to visit some of the local sites of interest  and Javier would be here for them to ask any questions. He gave them the maps of all the floors and dives they would make and recommended they study them.

“Can we film our dives?” Roger asked.

“I will video all your dives and at the end of your visit present them to you,it will be our  parting gift.You and Carrie will be busy enough adapting to the conditions down there,the lighting can be pretty tricky. I’m used to it and all our guests have loved the videos.”

“That’s great!” Roger  smiled,slightly disappointed he was not going to be allowed to film.

When the  day arrived for Roger and Carrie’s first dive,Javier met them in the lobby and  took the lift down to the wine cellar. Everything they needed was there, and Javier uncovered a barrel shaped hole  in the floor and pressed a lever for the underwater lights,which made the freshly uncovered  hole glow in the restricted light in the cellar.

They put on their small scuba tanks,checked each others masks and connections, and each gave each other the agreed signal to continue the dive.

Javier entered “the hole ” first, and Roger and Carrie followed. They were under the floor of the cellar and had to swim through the timber supports and infrastructure under the hotel.Without the lights, it would have been impossible.It was narrow and full of obstacles, and their progress was slow.

Javier signalled that he was stopping, and Roger and Carrie waited patiently as Javier opened what looked like a man hole cover, which in the narrow confines was just underneath his chest.

On opening the cover ,Javier beckoned for Roger and Carrie to enter. Roger pulled himself through into an amazing underwater cavern. He kicked his fins and realised he could move downwards through the seawater.Carrie followed it was so much better than it had been underneath the cellar.

Javier followed. It was an enormous cavern ,again, it was lit, and it was a beautiful sight to see. The white rock glistened and shimmered ,the water was crystal clear, and Javier signalled to continue downwards, which they did.

The cavern was like a large warehouse,not like a normal cave dive,where there would be fish,plankton, and seaweed. It was crystal clear, and they swam down and then around the bottom.Once they reached the bottom,they could see a door,Javier turned the metal wheel, which held the door shut and all three of them entered the small sealed chamber.Javier closed the door behind them and signalled to swim upwards out of the chamber along a wall which had a  ladder attached . Suddenly, they surfaced and realised they were  in a large natural  cave ,they could hear the sea.They were outside.They climbed out of the water using the ladder.

This is our private beach,it’s a nice day so we can have lunch at the bar and then we’ll walk back to the hotel.Well done on your first dive!

Roger and Carrie breathed a sigh of relief,it had been so different to normal diving, and not knowing where you were going  had been difficult.Still it was an amazing place. As they took off their gear, some people appeared with towels and a hand-held cart  to bring their gear back to the hotel .They walked out into the  sunshine and saw the bar, which had a wonderful selection of seafood.

Their dives continued each day,sometimes, they would do the same dive for two or three weeks as there was a lot to do and a lot to see.

After three months ,they were using saturation diving all the time and relying on the decompression chambers on floor 8 and below. They weren’t the only ones living at those in depths.The restaurants and accommodation were fully staffed,aswell as technical staff who maintained the diving equipment.

Roger and Carrie knew that they were at depths that were close to the maximum any human could dive. They had seen ancient ruins and bottom dwelling fish and creatures that probably had still to be discovered by naturalists.Javier had filmed all of it for them.

One day after a long dive,Carrie asked Javier when they would start making their way up again. They were having dinner in the  restaurant on floor 2.

“Ahhh,Javier said,that is up to you.Do you want to do your final dive to Floor 1 then?”

“Yes,why not? Then maybe we should start heading back up and let our bodies get back to normal gradually.”

“OK ,floor 1, it is tomorrow.”

Floor 1 was Roger and Carrie’s final dive.For some ,it would have been a bit creepy, and indeed, Roger and Carrie were surprised to find that it was a memorial to the men and women who had built the fantastic deep dive facility under El Hotel de Profund.

In fact,the cold had preserved their bodies perfectly. Each body had their own chamber with a glass front, and there must have been at least a hundred chambers in the blue lit cavern all arranged in a circle ,all looking out into the water that Carrie and Roger were swimming in.

Roger and Carrie began to feel disorientated and signalled to Javier,but he was nowhere to be seen.They swam around frantically, but they couldn’t find the exit, and the staring eyes of the dead divers  bodies made them panic.Eventually they knew they were running out of gas.

Just before they both lost consciousness,they saw two empty chambers and realised that those two chambers were going to be for them and that they were indeed to be part of the memorial for those who helped build and maintain El Hotel de Profund. Carrie’s last word was “Susan”.

Dive

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Normal Service Will be Resumed…….

Normal service will be resumed once I sort out my planting,weeding, and general holding it together on my allotment.Spring is a busy period!Oh and I think I had a cold,had a very stiff shoulder which seems to be getting better.

In the meantime….I’m enjoying the variety and quality of everyone else’s blogs.

XX

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The One Question I Hate To Be Asked

Where do you see yourself in five years?

“Where do you see yourself in five years?”

No matter how many times I’ve answered that question, I’ve never gotten it right.

There is no right or wrong answer; I hear the personnel manager saying,but there must be as I never got the job.

It matters not to me today.

“Who knows?” I would say now.”I’m not a great omnipotent being who can predict the future?Are you?Suppose the No.9 bus has your name on it and you can’t escape it running over you in the supermarket as you look for your sugar free oat milk. Anything is possible ,and anything can happen.I’m too young to retire,but ideally, I would like a few beach holidays in the next five years. But,perhaps that’s wishful thinking, not as you propose planning ahead.

Planning  ahead,that’s scary.Maybe none of us will be here in five years .Maybe the government will decide we’re surplus to requirements and dispose of us like so much rubbish.Maybe I will win the lottery or a publishing deal.There are a lot of maybes.

At the moment, all I can see is  getting this job and learning your computer system and becoming a useful wage slave to this Company. “

Oh I wish I’d said that,it probably would have got me the job!

Still it’s a horrible question.

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Tuesday Trash: Maidenform Making Padded Bras for 5 Year Old Girls

Just when I thought I was going to make it through a Tuesday without having a rant… I found this story via a news link. PopSugar was the one covering it and they got it from NBC’s San Diego affiliate. Per the story: A new trend in young girls’ fashion is raising some eyebrows: padded […]

Tuesday Trash: Maidenform Making Padded Bras for 5 Year Old Girls

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March…..A new bird…

Heard a Nuthatch this morning in woodland near me while out walking my dog this morning.

Nuthatch

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The Mystery of the March Early Bird….Birds….

I sneaked out the back door this morning,although the bird song appeared to be coming from the front.

However,if I had tried opening the front door, the dog would have jumped out of bed , shot down the stairs, and  ran past me at full pelt to see what was going on.

So listen from the back garden I did..and I found  two early morning singers.

The Blackbird and the Robin are the early risers.

Blackbird
Robin

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That Time I Hid in the Bushes

US Open, 2005. I have a bear to deliver, and not even shrubbery will stop me.

That Time I Hid in the Bushes

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A Satirical Glimpse into Our Digital and Caffeinated Chains

Reistag:https://www.getyourguide.ru/reikhstag-l2701/?partner_id=81ULMQE&utm_medium=online_publisher A Satirical Glimpse into Our Digital and Caffeinated Chains Let’s dive into a satirical story in which the characters find themselves in an exaggeratedly addictive relationship with three seemingly indispensable elements of modern life: smartphones, social media, and coffee. In the not-too-distant future, a new law is introduced in the city of Technotopia: every […]

A Satirical Glimpse into Our Digital and Caffeinated Chains

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Ah March is Here….

I walked out my front door with my dog in tow to a cacophony of bird song.

Good start on March the First.

I was so happy I shared it with a random grandfather who was walking with his grandchild in his pram.Weirdly,he was German(must be on holiday visiting relatives) and didn’t understand a word I was saying. However,he looked at my phone and  tried to translate the types of birds into his language.

Anyway, here they are

House Sparrow

House Sparrow

Starling

Starling

Robin

Robin

Goldfinch

Goldfinch

Magpie

Magpie

Greenfinch

Greenfinch

Common Wood Pigeon

Wood Pigeon

Quite a menagerie.

My next task  is to find out the bird who starts singing around here at 4.30am in the morning…I need to get a recording without disturbing the whole house.

Till next time!

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